Any advice on how to mend a relationship where everything is perfect-but the sex fizzles?

My girlfriend and I care about each other and get along fine,- and the relationship is great- except one thing-


The sexual chemistry really isnt there....


We have incompatible sex drives- I'd like it at least once a week- she prefers once a month ...So the lack of sex has been a big issue...


She argues sex 'is not that important to her', and every thime I try and bring it up, she reminds me 'its not important'. She accused me of being obsessed with sex, as she says I keep bringing it up-(Probrolly because we havent had any sex in 3 weeks).


We have discussed marriage- Im hoping our sexual problems will get better once we get married- If anyone has dealt with the problem with a happy relationship-but an unhappy sex life- how did you handle the situation? A strength of our relationship is open lines of communication- she asserts she was not abused, just she doesnt have a strong sex drive, and I should respect that.


I'm 40, she's 32, we're both fit, healthy and I think good looking.Any advice on how to mend a relationship where everything is perfect-but the sex fizzles?
I have been married to my husband for 15 years. And although our sex drives were equal in the beginning, over the years his has diminished, while mine has stayed steady. What I know is that he is my best friend in the whole world. I know that I am IN love with him, he is a terrific father and he is a wonderful husband that takes such great care of me it's ridiculous. Relationships need to have compromise in order to suceed. 3 weeks is quite a while, but not THAT long. My husband and I have gone up to 6 months without (during difficult times) and up to 2 months when things have been perfect. I do agree that sex is important in any healthy relationship. But, just to let you know - if you get married - sex won't get better or more frequent - in truth, it will most likely become less and less. But seeing that you both communicate with each other - there are many ways you can discuss the situation. Is she bored with what you are doing in bed? Maybe if you ';spiced things up'; a bit, it would get the ball rolling. Is she on any kind of medications that would lower her sex drive? (antidepressants are a major cause of lowering sex drives). There are a lot of ';remedies'; out there for women and men these days to help increase sex drives. Most of them contain natural herbs (see links below). Perhaps you could try that. In any case - before you walk down the aisle, you should decide if you are willing to compromise a lot of sex for a soulmate. In the end, only you can decide. Good luck.Any advice on how to mend a relationship where everything is perfect-but the sex fizzles?
LOL! If you get married it will probably decrease to once every two or three months before you know it... Some women just don't have much of a sex drive. She is in her 30s? What makes you think she will all of a sudden decide she has to have you every other day or every other week for that matter? Physical chemistry is very important to a lasting relationship...





The way I see it, especially if you are going to get married and don't want to go behind her back and disrespect her by having an affair, maybe you should try and establish an open relationship for purposes of physical satisfaction. Be safe of course... Otherwise, I suggest moving on.
hey, watch out, she might be banning some other dude,


just a though ......
She wants someone else. Trust me, it happened to me.
If you are unhappy with your sex life now marriage will not make her want to have sex more. Do not marry someone that does not fullfill your needs. It want last.Tell her if she loved you enough to want to marry you then she would love you enough to see a counsellor
i say girl i boned the s*** out of u
Please don't marry her,you can-not change a person just by getting married.This is huge problem that only gets worse in time.Although you may love her brake up with her.There are so many good looking women out there that would feel so lucky to have a man with a healthy sex drive.Once a week is nothing.I don't care what she says she does have a problem,and not wanting to talk about it is even worse.Get out of this problem or you could find yourself resenting her and having to take care of yourself the rest of your life or be tempted to cheat on her.Please,,,she just isn't worth you.Sorry Sir.
my girlfriend is very much the same. with the excuse and all, but we are very close and talk about everything, and she understands that as a man i need/want it more than her, so she tries to give in alittle more, but if she dont want it, i dont get it!!





being a male sux!! :)
If you can't get things fixed now, marriage is most definitely not going to solve the problem. I know you may want to think that, but the security of marriage doesn't mean more sex.





The problem here is that something that is important to you (sex on a more regular basis) isn't important to her, as she has obviously stated. However, in any loving relationship, what is important to one partner must, to some degree, be important to the other. Even if it's not important to her, you and your needs should be.





If she is that unwilling to even -consider- your needs, then I would say you have some problems that run a lot deeper than sex.





Wanting to have sex once a week definitely does not qualify as obsessed! The next time she wants to do something that you aren't into, try asking her how she felt if you just said ';No. I'm not interested in that so I'm not doing it.'; If you are not important enough in her life for her to be willing to take care of such basic desires, then the relationship will most likely never work.
Maybe couples counseling would help.





Obviously there is some issue not being addressed on her side.
if you guys get married.


your sex life will dwindle down to NOTHING.


ont do it mayne.
Do something fun for Valentines day...and naughty games always exciting.