I've been in an on/off relationship with a guy for 3+ years now. We're the same person; you couldn't find two people that would be more ';perfect'; together, as corny as that sounds. Anyone can see that. However, he's ALWAYS been in a relationship, and they haven't been the best. We're only 22, and he's at the point where he clearly doesn't want a relationship with anyone. But, i found out he's been having sex with another girl, and he won't tell me anything about it. He says it's not that serious. But it bothers me because we're so close, and when stuff like this has happened before (yes, it has a few times in the past when we haven't been ';official';) he always told me. That almost hurts more than the sex because we're best friends %26amp; I feel like the only one who didn't know. I think it's because he doesn't wanna feel like he has a gf he has to answer to, and if he told me, he'd prolly feel like that. But still, I've always known this stuff before.
We love each other deeply, we're each others best friends, and he said he's sorry many times for hurting me and would miss me like hell if I wasn't in his life. He says he's simply just not ready to give me what I need. And I can understand that, and still be here until he's ready because I really love this person. Our relationship has always been complicated, but I just have this gut feeling we're right together. I don't think we would've wasted over 3 years if we didn't want this to develop into something real; esp. when it would've been pretty simple to cut it off if we rly wanted to.
BUT, this is what bothers me. See, he's got a lot more sexual experience than I have. I was a virgin when we had sex (no, that hasn't affected why I think he's the one for me... sex doesn't matter that much to me, I just happened to have been a virgin). and clearly, I'm not as experienced. I know he doesn't want ANYONE right now, and he hasn't been with me because he doesn't wanna hurt me like he's done with other girls. I'm aware he's wanting to be single and have fun, he's said that. But I'm afraid I won't be enough for him sexually. I know if i was given the chance, we could PRACTICE (which would seem like more fun with someone you actually reallyyyy care about...) and I could get ';better'; at it. I mean, I understand him wanting instant gratification. Esp. when he doesn't want a relationship right now, which is what it would be with me if we took the time out to have sex on a regular basis, etc. (Another detail.... we haven't had sex as often as possible because we live about an hour away from each other).
HOWEVER, I'm moving %26amp; going to school where he is in about a month. Should I see what happens, or cut him out of my life? I mean, I dearly and deeply love this guy. I want to believe that sex isn't going to be the deciding factor. Yes, it's not all that great and just kinda awkward, but we do love each other. He isn't that great either, but I'm willing to keep trying. And i'm not repulsive, lol. Like, anyone knows that if you love someone and take the time, sex can get better. I mean, what if when he's ready, and we actually see each other more, there's a chance for it to finally work out? Am I stupid for thinking this? Even he has said that when I move, and he ';somewhat lives with me, if i still want that,'; that things may be different bc it'll definitely be a very diff. situation. Yes, there's the him having sex with another girl and such issues like that I have to deal with, but should I at least give it one last shot? He's a smart guy, and I know he prolly really is just not grown up yet. It's just hard to judge what to do, esp. when I know he DOES care about me.
Any advice is appreciated. Thanks.Any advice for a complicated, long-term relationship?
.Excuse me are you blonde.You can't run away because your pants are round your ankles.Or are you just stupid.Kids in kingergardens are smarter than you.Oh and you know he cares about you.That only proves how brilliant yu are
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